the money issue...

i didn't want to do it but i think it is time to talk about the money.

the whole thing started because we wanted to save money but we found that we couldn't. there was no where to cut back. after rent and council tax and other bills all our money went on food and kids activities. we budgeted carefully, planned our meals, used washable nappies but there was nothing extra.. we were only just surviving month to month. this was made worse by papajoes sucky job. he worked ridiculous hours, including weekends and evening and was often away. but they didn't seem to appreciate the effort he went to, the time with us that he had given up. they expected, in fact demanded more and more. because we couldn't save any money we were stuck. maybe when our contract ran out in april we should of moved to a smaller house and let him carry on his horrid job for another year or two while we saved but we couldn't face it. after baby was born and we, finally after two years, had papajoe at home for a while we realised how much we had missed him and how much we needed him with us. it was then that we made up our minds that we couldn't carry on, we needed to get him out.   

my grampy had offered us some of our inheritance early in order to start us off on this mad adventure and we have managed to put together a very small sum from the sale of our furniture and the return of all (can't quite believe it.. big boy spent at least 12 of the 18 months we were there scribbling on walls and radiators) of our deposit from the house. but when he sadly passed away last month we found ourselves in the awkward position of having to raise the inheritance question earlier than was perhaps appropriate. i don't want to take away from the sadness of his loss. he was loved dearly by us all and will be missed intensely but we are relying on his money to be able to move forward. the money has gone into probate and we are now waiting to hear when it will be released and how much it will be.  

the fear of course is that we don't know how long it will take. that we will use up the small amount of money that we have scraped together waiting and drifting from place to place. papajoe has two weeks left of work and we want to be celebrating and moving forward. but we are not really sure where to go. it is the first time i have felt really nervous about this project and what will happen to us.

easter break

the whole family is together at mums (even my big little bro) so made a decision not to think about the big move and just enjoy the long easter weekend. sadly it didn't work out quite that way.. had some advice from a friend of ours with regards to wood and that has thrown up some serious questions about where we buy our yurt. i don't know wood so the larch vs ash debate is going to take some research. any thoughts welcome..? 

there are so many companies that sell yurts, people who will teach you to make your own yurt. they range in price and size and optional extras. it is so confusing and there is so much more to think about than i ever anticipated. and it goes so much further than which wood.. will it be carved or painted? what flooring do we need? what about a stove? how many layers of felt and canvas? what about windows and a door? and that is just the yurt. that is not even touching on washing facilities, a toilet, cooking facilities, other furniture and the really big one.. location. so much for not thinking.

on a more fun note our first week without a house is nearly up and it has been a busy week for kids. baby is interacting and moving more and more everyday.. he nearly sits independently, is reaching and grabbing and even tried his first taste of banana. doll is writing her own name and can tell me things about the ancient egyptians i never knew before. and big boy, well he is always busy and now when he wants to avoid answering questions or doing what he is told he tells you as much. "sorry mum, i'm very busy".

tomorrow we set off for the west country and the next stop on our imposing yourself on your relatives tour. it should be a fantastic week catching up with old friends, and going to familiar places. watch out bristol. 

stylish homelessness

homelessness in (messy) style..

travelling bunting courtesy of the fantastic motherfunker at feetonthegroundandheadintheclouds

double bed and en suite shower room courtesy of my lovely mummy
and the mess.. oh crap i need a whole house to fit all my mess

no fixed abode

we went back to the house today to finish up and i was surprised that there were no tears. doll went around the place and said her goodbyes.. goodbye greenhouse, goodbye garage, goodbye kitchen, goodbye under stairs cupboard.. well you get the point. she remained very matter of fact about it and when she sat on my lap waiting for grandma to pick us up she said, "it is strange and exciting not having a house. we could live in the car... me and big boy will sleep in the boot, you papajoe and baby can sleep in the back and we can do our cooking in the front".

i did feel sad to say goodbye though.. just before getting into the car i looked through the window of the living room, the room i had hoped baby would be born in, and it occurred to me how many memories we had made in that house.

so much has changed since we moved to the fens 18 months ago. for a start we were only four then and now we are five. we have embarked on a home edding journey that was not our original plan but has been rewarding and challenging in equal measure. we have made interesting and inspiring friends. we have discovered a landscape that is both beautiful and bleak. we are more determined than ever that we can be together and happy, that we don't need high status jobs or loads of cash.

but doll is right, this feeling of floating not knowing what will happen next, it is strange. i am not scared, i sometimes feel that i should be, i try to be but i'm not. maybe as the end of the month approaches and our relatives hospitality is waning the fear will kick in. i will get back to you, let you know. but as for now i hope to enjoy being around my extended family and meeting a much awaited new baby girl. it is a good lesson in living for the moment, for the present. a lesson the kids were born knowing and seem to unlearn as they get older.

we may have no fixed abode but as a very wise person reminded me, we are at home when we are with our loved ones, so i am very much at home right where i am.

clean and paint my house

well i am out.. i set off last night leaving papajoe behind to finish up.. i would like to say i left after a very productive day and there is hardly anything left to do but i'm afraid it is quite the reverse. mostly we watched tv on the laptop, ate quiche and pretended to be working.  saturday was only slightly better. only two of my mumma friends could make it in the end so while one held baby and the other cleaned the windows i ran around like a headless chicken not achieving an awful lot.

the children, i was hoping would enjoy their last day in the garden and i would get lots of great bouncing and splashing photos to remind us of our last few days in the house. but after two weeks of glorious sunshine it was grey, windy and a bit too chilly for the paddling pool. instead they sat in a dark room glued to nanny mcphee and the big bang http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVOzEmywwMM.

the whole of our house is squeezed into 82sq ft of storage container..

and as of tuesday we will be officially homeless.

the big trip is cancelled

a lovely day in the sunshine with the wonderful motherfunker who bought us all kinds of goodies, boxes and bags and yummy things to eat. but i can't shake the disappointment that our big trip for tomorrow is cancelled. the yurt guys can't fit us in and so the kids will have to wait, i will have to wait until another day. we were, to make a day of it, also planning a trip to the british museum. doll has gone mad for the egyptians these last few days and we were going to see if we could hunt some out. however we have decided that london is too far for us to just go anyway and we ought to stay home and tick some things off the to do list.. but you know what.. fuck it.. one day can't hurt. it is papajoes birthday and i refuse point blank to make him give up a lovely day in the sun for boring house stuff. so we won't go to london, doesn't mean we can't do lots of other fun sunny things and have one day not thinking about the move.  

since writing the above papajoe has refused to go along with my plan, he is convinced that i am mad.. we must make use of the day we have been given to get on with stuff. there is just to much to do to relax we must work work work! we may, in order to celebrate have a mini butterfly hunting trip to the woods but that is all. for the rest of the day we must deny all knowledge of birthdays. he has insisted on no presents, and although i would normally ignore this ridiculous request i have totally failed to get anything what with the kids bugs etc, so he will have nothing to open. i will have to get up first so he can have coffee and toast in bed.

oh well.. still have the party to look forward to. tiny bit worried that if this weather continues we will all lounge in the garden, drinking the cider papajoe has requested, and nothing will get done. but it will be a lovely way to say goodbye to the house. i am grateful for the things it has given me over the last 18 months and it deserves a good send off.

the mess that is half living half moving

  the one bookcase we intend to  

  keep, i will have to fit all the toys, 

  books and crafty bits on here.. 

  good luck with that! 

doll and big boy enjoying their last week in the playroom 

what was the grown up living room and home to all the grown up books, now packed and stored in nonnas loft, oh how i miss you

the room that used to have a gigantic bed, and is now just a mattress filled bomb site

can you spot baby?

the ridiculously full garage..
what am i still doing with all this stuff? 

if i tell the truth although i blame the packing i wasn't much tidier than this before we started..